Has anyone ever gone for a certification test and used a computer that made them think “wow, I wish I had one of these at home”?

Is it just me, or does every testing centre in the world use computers that only manage to run Windows 95 because someone has crank started them every morning? The shared use computers in eastern European backpacker hostels are like HAL from 2001 compared to these things. I’m sure that if you looked hard enough, you’d still find the installation files for the Y2K patches that must have been applied to these relics! There is something distinctly surreal about doing a Windows Vista exam on a computer that wouldn’t run Windows NT 4 Workstation unless you got out and pushed!

Where do they find them? How do they keep them running so long? Is this where all those Pentium Pros went? Do the components simply not fail out of spite, drawing sustenance from the malice, loathing and contempt that test takers have had for them over the years?

Has any reader taken a certification exam on a computer with a monitor that is larger than 15 inches and a hardware configuration that wouldn’t page the hard disk to the point of disintegration if someone actually installed an operating system written sometime this century on it?

They say that in an infinite universe all things must come to pass. Perhaps that is true. Perhaps, somewhere out there exists a testing center with nice high resolution monitors, more than 256 MB of RAM and keyboards and mice that you can touch without getting that sticky tactile experience we know and love.

But I’m kinda doubting it.